I find myself wanting to document only the bad things that happen.
I should be celebrating the good!
However, this is not one such post.
My anxiety has returned.. Like winter to farmer.
It sucks so bad but you knew it was coming anyways.
My night anxiety gets so bad that I think there must be a spider in my stomach. It's not the booming lubb dubb in my chest as in the past, but more of a heart churning type of feeling. Things just don't feel right. Im anxious. Excited almost.
I skipped my medication a lot for the past 2 months and yet i'm fine. But the doc says that i am not in the clear yet.
No fever why must still take medicine?
it's almost gotten to an extent that my pills are brought to me at night and I am being watched as I take my pills. I feel that I'm that girl. The girl you see in movies that lives in the crazy ward and then pretends to swallow her pills and then spits them out when the guard isn't looking. Or am I channeling Orange Is The New Black?
In any case, I deserve it. I really should take my medication. It's vitamins, for my brain.
